Farewell, My Turnabout: Scrolling Text.

[mistytpednaem]

Alrighty, before we begin: this is going to be a short one, it's pretty much just cross-examining Oldbag. I decided to cut it short instead of risking running it too long, because Adrian is coming next and, well, we know I can get a bit wordy about her...

So, to make up for it, I tried my hand at the drabble meme! Sadly, uh, it only took me four of them to run out of creative juice, and the last two were severely lacking in quality. Still, here they go, if you want to read them for some reason. If not, just listen to the music I'm linking you to. If you don't like it, then pelt me with rotten tomatoes or something.


Rei Kondoh - Ezo Fuji Irwak Shrine (Okami)
(It doesn't have lyrics, but it does induce a clear mental image in me...)

"Maya..." Phoenix didn't even know why he still bothered trying to reason with that girl. Sure, he could keep telling her they weren't in a "dungeon" or solving any puzzles, but she wouldn't listen, would she?

"Oh, come on, Nick! Just let your imagination run wild for a little while, okay?" She must have guessed what he was thinking. Was he really that easy to read? "I just want to have some fun before I start my training. You should understand, you must have been young once, too!"

"I... must have been, huh?" he replied dryly. "Fine. So we're in the Hazakura Shrine..."

"Hazakura dungeons," Maya corrected.

"Right, we're in the Hazakura dungeons, and we're looking for... what are we looking for, again?"

"Gosh, Nick, I know you're not at the peak of your youth anymore, but I can't believe you're that forgetful already! We're..." She paused. For quite a while. "... You know, I'm not sure either."

And people wondered how he could be so snarky sometimes.


Porcupine Tree - Halo (I can only find live versions and covers ;;)
(Holy sudden mood swing)

She came to him during the recess, his darling teen angel. All grown up and just as beautiful as he remembered her.

But he couldn't give her a smile. He didn't trust her anymore. I'm so sorry, she said. She was sorry and everything about her was beautiful and her touch was as gentle as ever. She was sorry for him, too. He had been a very bad boy, hadn't he? He had. He wasn't sure what he'd done, but his angel said it and he could only nod and avoid her eyes. But he had the vial, didn't he?

He did. He had it.

You promised me. You'll drink it, won't you?


Drop - ローゼンさとりん
(Oh God oh God what am I going to write oh Godddd)

This was it. The world, nay, the Universe depended on the outcome of their battle. One would continue to uphold justice, just as he'd always done; the other, should he win, would merely oppress (and impress) all human beings with his piercing epic eyes.

Or so was the explanation Phoenix got when he found the Judge and Winston Payne battling with broomsticks in the men's bathroom.


Jamiroquai - When You Gonna Learn
(Took me a while, but I got it after staring the lyrics down)

The evidence was abundant, the circumstances were clear, her suspect was certainly guilty. An outside observer would think this would be easy to resolve, but Mia knew better. No matter how much evidence there was or how obvious the heinous crimes were, she was all too aware of one single, dreadful detail: Redd White was untouchable.

Why wouldn't anyone put a stop to it? It wasn't long before she learned to stop asking herself that question.

But she knew this one thing: if no one else stopped him, she would, sooner or later. Even if it took her a lifetime.


AND NOW, JUSTICE.




Boy howdy, isn't the kidnapper such a nice, comforting old man? A-Aahahahahoh God Shelly you creeper




SPEAKING FROM EXPERIENCE.




"A bullet. It was a bullet. From my gun. I was trying to make a metaphor."




... Fuck you, Matt.




... Welp.


And now allow me to transcribe directly from my notes just for a bit:

 

"- SO IT WAS A METAPHOR AFTER ALL (I'm sorry I'm not taking this seriously yet)"





"- Geez Phoenix he was only trying to help (really I'm sorry)" (... Why did I address Phoenix when I wrote that?)




"- HOW CAN I START TAKING THIS SERIOUSLY WHEN EDGEWORTH JUST BURSTS INTO THE COURTROOM ALL '>C'"




Ah, finally, on a serious note: anyone else ever wonder if this was more than a coincidence? I mean, it certainly wasn't one on the writers' behalf, but did Shelly know anything about Franziska's father?





Nicest damn thing Edgeworth says in the whole trial.




Do I... Do I have to say anything?




"And yes, I assure you that being an arrogant dick is completely necessary at times."







... You know, I'm surprised Edgeworth's not dead yet. We all know what happens to the men Oldbag sets her eyes on...




Also, it's still funny to see him like this. You know it.

(At some point after this, I had to take a break because I was damn near asleep. I want to blame lunch, but I think we all know the real reason... Sorry, Oldbag, I like you, but right now you're just being filler.)




Ever since you had to cross-examine April May.




You've got to give her some respect, I would never manage to be so calm if Edgeworth growled at me like that.




... Now let's not be mean to poor Phoenix, this might just be a coping mechanism. He's under a lot of stress, okay?





Do you see what they did here? I think I do. Attached to the rest of Oldbag's testimony, doesn't the notion that "Engarde is an evil man" seem ridiculous? (This is the only vaguely interesting thing I've said in this post, move along now)





When you consider this isn't even the worst way this case tries to mess with you...




In my first playthrough, it took me AGES to figure this out. AND IT WAS TERRIBLE BECAUSE OF MAYA AND THAT CREEPY BASTARD WHO HAD HER.




I believe the phrase "It Gets Worse" can apply here.


Next time: it gets worse (I foresee keysmashing).